I was born in a peasant family, the father to the behavior and personality from the body showed weakness, the mother is good and strong and capable, many livelihoods depend on a mother's wisdom to maintain, from small to large feel that the authority of the mother and their dependence on the mother. While the father was on a family and warm blood. However, busy parents feed their families, very few take into account the needs of heart children, the first year, I should be that most of the time sitting in a chair watching helplessly poor children outside world, a serious lack of her mother's embrace and companionship, which makes the close relationship between my mother and I have not been established.
out because parents are busy, and I started mainly from the year-old grandmother to take care of,cheap UGG boots, but my grandmother did not like me, and often cursed called nickname, which deeply hurt my young heart, so since I can remember has lived in fear, afraid of feelings, which deeply affected my personality, because that is what I started evolving personality. My grandmother by the fear in fear of her anger and resentment and bitterness of Health. I told her the attitude of my reaction to my brothers and sisters cast and the rest of us: I think they do not like me. Her attitude towards me even more direct projection to the attitude of my own: I was not like it, I was not bad; and I am self-esteem, no sense of the value. Sensitive to the characteristics of low self-esteem and makes me with people in self-protection, self defense, and often over-protection and self-defense in stabbing the people with me, also stabbed himself, and I took to the lonely, too This process of hurting themselves and others suffered the guilt can not be put off. Therefore, I feel in my brothers and sisters, and classmates and work colleagues are to be isolated by: feel out of tune with others. Sense of self-neglected inner desire to be more aroused attention and concern for the wishes; me in the crowd did not dare to express themselves frankly, afraid of being rejected, it is not possible to establish intimacy with others. I do feel the pain. I'm not low self-esteem also play to their abilities, because I'm afraid people do not recognize their own performance, which often contain my own that has to play.
loved attention needs to be formed a deep emotional memory, forming a huge hole in the mind,Discount UGG boots, like how many people love and praise can not be satisfied in my heart . From Erikson's Personality Theory, and I did not develop at puberty and a good personality, manifested as dependence, paranoid personality, the role I did not get my identity, I do not know who I am.
(b) medium-term
my adult relationship with his father, family education, and my personality so affected my adulthood and marriage:
1. My father's relationship with his father's cowardice
was bullied so I grew up in the heart of outstanding caliber to the strong influence of men. Lack of intimacy with his father and the personality of the shortcomings that I desire is in the twilight of adolescence to keep the heart and men apart. Men can not handle the normal social interactions. Of a passion rather than the mature expression of gender relations, and I pulled into a premature marriage.
2. Family Education
not directly teach the parents of knowledge, the correct view of mate choice, and her husband live with nature. Basic aspects of the marriage that I feel is a virtue, self-awareness to act. Lack of proper guidance values.
3.
My personality which I have spoken to low self-esteem and personality to get along with her husband, I too self-protection, fear of frank to right, the lack of an intimate relationship and the lack of capacity to love, the heart is also a strong requirements of being loved and respected.
might imagine, I love and marriage do not let myself get satisfaction and joy of heart, but in which deep pain.
my inner pain from my low self-esteem, my personality, my marriage. It can be attributed to (1) I and my own, (2) I and others, (3) I and the relationship between the external environment.
Second, the changes in my life and see
1997, I started looking for religion, but really accepted until 2005 the Christian faith. I was into the crisis-ridden marriage, I am desperate painful, full of resentment and bitterness, her husband, while their strong sense of guilt. But one day, my heart had a voice clearly told me: I also hope to learn from psychology to gain self-knowledge and progress.
Christian, I find the process, I first found myself in marriage fails to fulfill the responsibilities and adhere to the principle, although my husband need to mature and grow their own part of the problem but I am still one of the protagonists, so that the knowledge and understanding of me getting out of anger, resentment and bitterness, and learn all sorts of relationships in marriage and should observe the principles and truth. I found all kinds of relations must respect the principles and the truth is, if people do not follow, would have a good relationship will be destroyed, and that relations between the people will be hurt. This is the root cause of human suffering.
I was growing up I began to have a clear self-awareness, and gradually be accepted and respected. Because of my past that I can not change the signs of life, it is so true, and I'm pulling up to now I am. No matter how others look, but I'm still a part of. Respect to the past out of the once I hone my people and things to heart, the pain is suffering, but because the pain is greater thought struck my mind, I feel my life now seems to experience a squeeze but showing glory, this should be my true my return.
I began to learn to get along with their own, and to be honest with themselves: I am not a perfect person, but also this is not a perfect world, I only just maturing in the mature to accept some of his immature of me to make me complete. My existence is a miracle, I have my own value and meaning, I respect my existence (good and bad) and my values. I began to learn how to express their views.
people other than me I began to learn to respect and appreciate efforts to keep themselves in self-pride, anger, jealousy, hatred and other negative emotions in the fight against the injury, being in control. Learning to lay down their own people and things can not be changed. Strive to maintain relationships in all sorts of
I realized that I by the spirit, soul and body of the three aspects, I must seek spiritual growth, not only in yourself to spend to meet the needs of the body. My thoughts must follow the laws of the universe.
I see the laws of the universe as seen from Earth near the sun is not nearly as real as there is. I believe the great man once said: Otherwise, bring the person's own injuries and discipline. Mu scuttling the Himalayas to let them into the hot and humid southwest wind inland basin in China, which is one of the smart ideas, but if put into practice, I do not know how much damage the natural world to bring it. Although human beings into space, but good at the human mind to imagine the universe in the desert, Yat and laws of the universe can only sigh and go back in front of humanity itself small. In human society, each person is unique and worthy of respect for the individual, a limited member of a large social groups, including rules that people must be mutual respect, acceptance, care and understanding. Because everyone is so unique, he has the time, his death, his life path and even the pain of his life experience is unique and worthy of respect. Must put aside their prejudices and demands of others (rules).
everyone's minds are being affected by the management of conscience, if people stay away from honesty, loyalty, wisdom, kindness, friendship, responsibility, trust,UGG boots, and pregnant with possession of false heart, greed , hatred, vicious, evil, all in the person's face will be completely reflected, which is continuing against the conscience of the result of laws of the universe is the expression of the human heart. Must go back to the law of the universe. Gyrus in such a return, individuals to obtain freedom and liberation of the mind, get a full sense of security and acceptance of the existence and expression of individual talent is meaningful to him, his life is valuable. Otherwise, the expression of his presence and will harm others, his life is of no value. In this sense, I believe that absolute truth, the Bank of China shall, in truth, can not be arbitrary and can not ignore the laws of the universe (the truth) and action. But man can not be fully aware of lifetime exhausted all the truth, but at least required to maintain the attitude of seeking truth in life and try to follow the truth get in the self-growth, self-value of life.
I found the experience of low life and spiritual experience the great value of suffering, and hold the attitude of gratitude, and this attitude has led me to grow and change. My transformation to fundamentally improve my relationships, I am delighted that my students and to give encouragement and positive change, and I get along well with others.
In any case, the following point of view I have expressed are: First, I know the truth of the universe and return to them, my self and all sorts of relationships began to grow and breakthrough. My self I grow more like the old from the truth, I get a new life in the process. I get the remodeling of personality, the spiritual healing. (Of course, this is still an unfinished process)
Third, I directly affect the growth of my consulting philosophy
say I agree with Satir : Professional counselors confidence to start.
in the consultation, I will truly express myself (including my faith and truth, knowledge of laws of the universe), but I will abide by the provisions of national laws and industry . At this time, not to impose its values on the other side, I respect seeking help at this point to see and the life of his own attitude and trajectory.
see my relations and the gradual healing of the consultation process made me more inclined to help in seeking help to restore good environment, etc.), to help each other to obtain self-change: (1), including respect for and acceptance of his past (especially the experience of failure) and character defects, access to personal integrity; (2) guided self-help-seekers to seek changes in the strength of inward ; (3) and can not change people and things along and to the
own experience in growing pains me to see the value of mind and spiritual strength. Spiritual transformation makes the pain grow, because But growing up is not a consultant is often the
four,UGG boots clearance, my professional behavior analysis
1, I first want to become a psychologist, because I found my can Counselor as my career and livelihood. But with the deepening of self-exploration, various changes in the environment, belief learning, I am now more eager to become a good psychologist, because:
(1) I am willing to explore my own mind the process and get to share those with me had the same experience with the suffering and help people.
(2) it allows me to realize my value in which to raise self-esteem.
(3) it makes me get economic benefits.
I look forward to counselors to be my lifelong career. I think that if a counselor to obtain economic benefits for the first goal of moving into an excellent opportunity to become suppressed the power of counselors, I would like to position ourselves for the practitioners of the values.
2. I think I have the following make me become a good psychologist
(1) I continue to seek the truth and willing to learn and follow the attitude of continuous self-growth and help me break
( 2) I observed the sensitive temperament and ability, insight, introspection (self-awareness) and self-thinking features like heart led me to explore, but also gives me the ability to access space seeking help feeling and thinking;
(3) of my life in many fields of knowledge accumulation and
(4) I like to communicate with people and are eager to get a sense of accomplishment from helping others and self-worth
3. My career advantages of the project is:
(1) relationship between emotion and love and marriage help
(2) personal growth breakthroughs in
(3) parent-child relationship adjustment
4. My professional weaknesses are: counseling the opposite sex for their peers and help
this early growth due to my lack of a good relationship with his father established.
my relationship with my father and in the absence of a direct impact on the experience of marriage to my advice on male adult, I not good at dealing with the phenomenon of transference and countertransference. This is the part I was growing, so I will be seeking help to avoid the reception heterosexual peers, and therefore I hope I have the same reception and confused emotions and seeking help for treatment of the same sex. When I met when I could not help the case, I will refer to the relevant areas of professional consultants.
me from practicing my faith to get the energy and ability to handle the psychological pressure, or may experience a state of collapse, I have sought (1) conversations with the faithful; (2) exercise; (3) tourism; (4) Reading; (5) writing and other ways to relax.
work is my praise and blame external factors beyond the control of its own, I accepted and comfortable with, and hope to improve their professional qualities and skills.
counseling practice, I gradually build confidence in the Chiang Kai-shek, also in this process toward maturity of self and live out the true me, until the full advantage of the value of my existence.
at least, this is my true hope that the mind!
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